I'm winning Press-Ganey over patient by patient.
No, I am NOT going to induce you at 33 weeks. Yes, I understand your back hurts. Yes, I know sleeping can be difficult. But no delivery. Nuh-nuh, no fucking way. Please go ahead and curse out my checkout staff. We love it when you do that.
No, there is no medical reason for me to place you on complete bed rest at 36 weeks. Yes, if your pregnancy is uncomplicated, I do expect you to work. And no, your complaints are typical late pregnancy complaints, there is no objective reason for you to be sitting on your ass. Thank-you for calling the patient advocate at the hospital and wasting 5 hours of my and my office manager and the VP of clinical care's time defending my medical decision making. Fuck you. And yes, if you wish to transfer, go ahead and sign the records release. They will be faxed so fast your head will spin. So sorry the hospital administration agreed with me.
Nope, not gonna prescribe percocet to you for back pain in your first trimester.
There's an old Twilight Zone episode about a guy who can see into the future and give you what you need. At first, it seems weird - a shoe or a pair of scissors. Who wants that? That is a part of my job - I should give you what you need, not necessarily what you want.