Thursday, February 23, 2012

When I say...

Nothing in the vagina, I MEAN NOTHING in the VAGINA!!!

No fingers. No tampons. No toys. And certainly, NO PENISES!!! I don't care if you are celebrating your birthday/anniversary/baby daddy's jail release/Festivus. Nothing goes up your vagina.

I don't want to hear about your baby daddy complaining that the suture from my cerclage is scratching his wee-wee. I don't want a 3 am call from the ER telling me that your vaginal cuff eviscerated and there's bowel coming out of your vagina (a mood-killer if I've ever heard of one).

Just don't. Please?


Grumpy, M.D. said...

During my OB/GYN rotation in med school I have vivid memories of a lady coming back pregnant pretty soon after she delivered.

The attending walked in and said "When I told you not to put anything in your vagina for 6 weeks THAT INCLUDED DICKS!"

Your Doctor's Wife said...

Oh lordy! That will flop a doggie any day, huh?

Mary said...

I agree with you but...I know several men that take a statement like that as a personal challenge.

Not the one I married, fortunately.

Dr. G said...

Oh God. The things I have to look forward to :) I'll remember to explain this very very thoroughly once I start residency!!

Nurse and Hospital Stories said...

"...there's bowel coming out of your vagina"

lol. I don't dare to imagine it.haha. :)

Peny@nursing shoes