Quoteful week.

Lots of good ones this week. Not all from patients (see #1)

1. I had asked for Trendelenberg position from anesthesia, to help in a laparoscopic case. T-berg involves moving the bed such that the head is lower than the feet. Gyns use it to have gravity move bowel out of the pelvis when we're operating. Most CRNAs might give you 2-3 degrees of T-berg, but this one had her nearly doing a handstand.

"Andy, you give good T-berg!...that sounded wrong!"

2. Young patient, in for a birth control refill. I asked if she wanted STD testing. She declined saying she was finally being smart and using condoms. So far, a normal conversation.
Then:
"Since it's just us girls here, you know how it is. You have urges and you can't help yourself with them, so you need a man."

3. Another patient : "Why do I get yeast infections only when he goes down on me?"

4. Yet another patient, here for the first time this pregnancy (37 wks along): "I went to the ER because I thought I felt the baby move."