Pretty please

After my last weekend call, I'm officially banned from L&D per nursing staff :

"You just walk onto the floor and shit happens!"

"You ARE the full-fucking-moon!"

"STOP IT!!!!!!!"

"Shit magnet."

"Black cloud"

Crossing fingers that my partners agree to take me off call.  ;) Somehow, I doubt it.

Boys are silly

My son was staring at his fist this morning. "My brain is this big...no wait. My heart!"

Made me giggle.

Call

Is the bane of my existence. I hate call. I hate my phone. I hate my ringtone, which was the loudest one I could find (I'm a sound sleeper). I hate stupid questions (and yes, they most definitely exist). I will not drive back to the office at 4:45 on a Friday to do your prior auth. Sorry. Oh, GAWD, Jennifer Crazypatient paged again. Did you not get the memo that this is an emergency line? No, I can't schedule your next appointment - docs don't have access to the scheduling system. Call during office hours. Someone in the office called you and you're returning the call? Sorry, I have no clue why she called you - call back during office hours.

I don't mind going in for deliveries - but I prefer them during reasonable hours. I'm happy (sorta) to talk to the ER docs about what to do. I don't mind rounding on weekends - things are usually calm and I chat up the nurses. Frequently I bribe them with a dozen donuts.

But my phone. must. die.